Delivering Bad News - The Mediator is the Better Messenger
Published by Kreed April 17th, 2008 in ArticlesOne of the many beneficial roles a mediator can play is as the bearer of bad news. It is an observable truth that a mediator can do this better than the other available options, the alternatives being primarily the opposing party or his or her lawyer.
Why is the mediator a better messenger?
The mediator is the better messenger for at least three reasons. Firstly, the mediator is by definition neutral, and therefore he or she is usually perceived by the parties as being without partisan bias. Because of this, bad news delivered by a mediator is more likely to be heard and accepted rather than being dismissed as irrelevant bluster, or worse.
Secondly, mediators are in the best position to defuse or deflect the “shooting the messenger” problem.
Thirdly, and perhaps most importantly, a mediator can assist the recipient of bad news to work productively with the new information. Bad news is information that a party does not want to hear. It necessarily involves a challenge to her or his hopes or expectations. As such, bad news always involves a sense of loss with respect to the contrary and previously held hopes or expectations. As an instance of loss, bad news necessarily triggers a grieving process, which according to the classic view (Dr. Kubler-Ross) involves the phases of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
A mediator can help with this grieving process. The mediator can help the recipient of the bad news to move through the process and not get stuck. The mediator can work to contain the resulting emotions so that damage to the overall process is minimized. And, the mediator can work to refocus the recipient on realistic options once the process has been worked through.
In conclusion, the mediator is the better messenger for bad news, and this in direct proportion to the perceived severity of the bad news.

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